Faceţi cunoştinţă cu Marcel Boabă şi cu boala sa rară. Podoaba lui capilară conţine exclusiv fire de păr pubian. Floci, pentru cei care au deschis internetul mai târziu.
Descoperirea a făcut-o bunica lui Marcel, când acesta avea 14 ani. „Nu mai merge în mâini, că te înveţi aşa!”, i-a spus bunica. „Dar buni, nu merg în mâini!” a replicat Marcel. De atunci, existenţa acestui om a fost evident marcată de condiţia rară de care suferea. Tot liceul îl striga „Flocea” sau “Cariciu”, de exemplu. Fetele refuzau să-l mângâie în păr, iar câinii îl mârâiau din instinct de apărare. Deseori se vedea atacat chiar şi de păsări, ziua în amiaza mare. Marcel a trebuit să renunţe la şcoală şi să se descurce din meseria de vidanjor nocturn.
Pe la 25 de ani împliniţi, viaţa lui Marcel parcă-parcă dădea semne de mai bine, mulţumită tunsorilor afro care au poposit şi în România, în vâltoarea curentului disco. “Era regele disco-barului”, ne-au spus foştii săi colegi. Disco-ul a trecut şi încet-încet, oamenii au început să-l respingă din nou pe Marcel.
Mineriada din 90 l-a determinat să se izoleze total de societate. Atunci a fost alergat timp de 4 ore de mineri, pentru că barba lui deasă şi creaţă sugera un caz clar de intelectual revoltat care trebuia stârpit.
Astăzi, Marcel are 56 de ani şi trăieşte singur într-o casă de lemn, undeva în munţii Vrancei. Singurii oameni care îl mai văd sunt oierul, preotul şi o anumită Profira, care colectează părul pubian de pe capul bărbatului ca să confecţioneze pulovăraşe pentru copiii din corul satului.
Dacă e trist? Nu prea cred. Până la urmă, ca să citez un cetăţean, viaţa e ca un păr în cur. Scurtă şi plină de căcat. Probabil că Marcel e mai fericit că şi-o petrece în inima codrului.
Cam asta e povestea lui Marcel Boabă, omul căruia Dumnezeu nu o să-i pună niciodată mâna în cap.
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