1. Care din cei 101 de dalmaţieni eşti?
Vǎ puteţi limpezi acum (în sfârşit) care din cele 101 de personalitǎţi distincte vi se potriveşte cel mai bine. Da, a venit timpul sǎ vǎ împǎcaţi eul dezorientat! În urma rǎspunsurilor la întrebǎri despre nutriţie, fobia de cǎpuşe, fetişul amuşinǎrii şi poziţia preferatǎ de urinare, puteţi afla dacǎ sunteţi poate dalmaţianul 73 – introvertitul, cel cu numǎrul 93 – Lǎbuţǎ sau numǎrul 13 – Blanǎ.
2. Care tip de râgâit vi se potriveşte cel mai bine?
O veste bunǎ pentru toţi cei care au bâjbâit între atâtea opţiuni posibile şi nici pânǎ în ziua de azi nu şi-au dat seama ce fel de exteriorizare laringealǎ le-ar împǎca natura interioarǎ. Aflaţi dacǎ ar fi mai potrivit sǎ formulaţi un “OAC”, sǎ o daţi la repezealǎ în trepte ori graseiat sau practic sǎ râgâiţi un mesaj alegoric. Ca notǎ savuroasǎ la întregul quiz, mai este valabilǎ şi opţiunea “râgâit cu pulpǎ” pentru reprezentanţii vârstei a 3-a şi a 4-a.
3. Ce tip de literaturǎ merge cel mai bine cu scaunul d-voastrǎ?
S-a terminat coşmarul revistelor prost alese pe care sǎ le gǎzduiţi la subraţ şi ulterior sǎ vǎ suprime bucuria fireascǎ a cǎcǎrii. De câte ori nu vi s-a întâmplat sǎ alegeţi greşit? De câte ori n-aţi regretat cǎ aţi luat cu voi “Catalogul IKEA 2009″ la un scaun moale ? Sau “Star” la un dop de 5 zile?
NOTĂ : Între “Fraţii Karamazov”, “Rǎzboi şi Pace” şi “Cireşarii”, redacţia vǎ recomandǎ în mod firesc preţioasa colecţie de prozǎ scurtǎ “Lejereanu”. Doveditǎ de cercatǎtori maghiari cǎ elibereazǎ endorfinele de tip B, rǎspunzǎtoare de relaxarea pliurilor laterale ale sfincterului.
4. Care trol din Stǎpânul Inelelor eşti?
Cum fanii serialului fluviu “Stǎpânul Inelelor” ne pândesc de peste tot, a venit şi timpul sǎ se poatǎ împǎrţi în cete. Raţiunile sunt clare şi ţin de compatibilitǎţi. E la mintea pârşului cǎ trolul de peşterǎ nu se înţelege bine cu trolul de vizuinǎ, dar în schimb ar împǎrţi oricând un ficat de elf cu trolul de dumbravǎ. Iatǎ şi posibilitatea ca toţi trolii din lume sǎ ştie bine cu cine ar fi încântaţi sǎ facǎ sǎbiuţe pentru marcarea teritoriului şi cu cine n-ar face deloc casǎ bunǎ.
5. Care Bruce Willis eşti?
Cum toţi avem un Bruce în noi, hai sǎ-l şi dibuim! Chestionarul riguros scotoceşte prin diversele roluri întruchipate de celebrul actor : umoristul, tandrul, eroul, sociopatul, teroristul, tatǎl, prietenul, conducătorul auto, omul. Rǎspunsul la quiz se lasǎ aşteptat cam mult (întrebǎrile acoperind ani buni de zile din cariera starului) dar meritǎ fiecare secundǎ. Am aşteptat cu sufletul la gurǎ sǎ aflu ce anume mǎ defineşte, din moment ce tipologiile de Bruce posibile sunt 3: Die Hard 1 Bruce, Die Hard 2 Bruce sau Die Hard 3 Bruce. Iar rǎspunsul mi-a schimbat viaţa. Vǎ recomand experienţa.
6. Care loviturǎ de kung-fu eşti?
Cum viaţa tuturor românilor este inevitabil marcatǎ de filmele cu Bruce Lee şi de neînţelegerile în familie; şi cum cu toţii am fantazat mǎcar o datǎ în viaţǎ la cum l-am ţine în aer pe Fuego folosind doar picioarele, a venit timpul sǎ aflǎm care loviturǎ ne-ar caracteriza cel mai bine.
În funcţie de personalitate, alimentație şi carismǎ, veţi lovi (haha) un răspuns sigur între cele 25 posibile şi toate mortale. Amintesc aici de : “Scorpionul tolănit”, “Cufureala Dragonului” sau “Rotula Colibriului”.
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